Apologize
by AuntJackie
Summary: John and Zack are slowly building a relationship until John does something to destroy it all. Will he be able to open his heart andd get Zack back with a little help from a friend? Cena/Ryder Slash, Centon friendship


**A/N: Requested one-shot for Fishyqueen! Hope you like!**

**Disclaimer: I own no person, character, storyline from WWE! **

John looked up as the locker room door banged open and shut and smiled as his best friend walked into the nearly empty locker room. "What's up, bro?"

Randy rolled his eyes and threw his gym bag into the locker near the one John had chosen. "You're starting to sound like him now, too?"

John laughed and leaned back against the locker. "Don't start giving me shit already. It's too early, Ran."

Randy smiled and nodded. "Fine, I won't give you shit about your little boyfriend. I'll even pretend to like his annoying ass."

John shook his head and watched as Randy unpacked his bag and went about choosing his trunks for the night. "So, where's my baby girl? I promised her we'd hang out before the show tonight and tomorrow."

Randy sighed and collapsed into a chair. "She's home with Sam. She must've picked up a bug at school and wasn't feeling well. Trust me, she tried to fight it and come with me but just couldn't. She misses her Uncle John, too...even if he has been a shitty uncle as of late." Randy raised an eyebrow as John lowered his head. "Between your normal load of work and your new relationship, and I use that term loosely, your family barely sees you anymore."

John looked up, a guilty expression on his face. "I've just been a little extra busy lately. Doesn't mean I'm any less dedicated to my family, Ran." He frowned and stared at Randy carefully. "Can I be honest with you, though?" John waited for Randy's nod before continuing. The younger man now had a confused look on his face but John pressed on. "You think I've been a shitty uncle lately? Well, I think you've been a shitty friend lately."

Randy's eyebrows rose and his mouth dropped open. "Excuse me?"

John sighed and turned over, taking a deep breath before responding. "Ran, we're best friends, right? Brothers by love if not by blood? Well, you haven't really acted like my brother lately. You're the only who knows I'm in a new relationship and you barely ask me about it. You just joke about it and him and don't show you support me and us in anyway..."

"Are you serious, bro?" interrupted Randy, a small smile on his face. John stared at him for a few seconds before laughing loudly, Randy's laughter joining in, the sound echoing through the locker room.

After a few minutes, Randy moved over to John and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "You're right, Johnny. I suck ass and I've been a shitty brother. You trust me with your personal stuff and I don't pay attention. I'm gonna do better, though. I'll make it up to you. How about tomorrow we go for lunch before I have to hit the road for Smackdown? Or even better, how about you and your boy Zack come back to St. Louis with me? That way you could spend some time with Al and me and Sam could see if this Zack kid is good enough for you."

John smiled and nodded. "That sounds like a great idea but you can start right now by calling him by his real name, Ran."

Randy frowned and bit his lip. "Right...his real name...it's not Zack?"

John laughed and shook his head. "It's Matt, Randy. I've told you a million times."

Randy quickly nodded and waved dismissively. "Right, right, Matt! I knew that. I was just testing you."

"You're such a dork," replied John with a smile on his face. "Thanks for doing this, Ran."

"Hey, you're my brother and the uncle of my baby. That makes you important in my life and if this guy is important to you then he'll be important to me." Randy sighed and looked at John out of the corner of his eye. "Is he really important to you?"

John nodded. "Yes, Ran..."

"You've seen how annoying he is, right?" asked Randy, wrinkling his nose.

John raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "I'm used to annoying people in my life."

"I'm sure I don't know who you're referring to." replied Randy as he stood. John smiled and looked down at his hands. "I think I'm falling in love with him, Ran."

Randy looked up from where he had begun his stretches on the floor. "That's great, Johnny. Why do you sound so sad about that, though?"

John remained silent, his eyes focused on the floor. Randy stood and walked back over to him. "Johnny, it's great. What's wrong?"

John raised his eyes to meet Randy's concerned gaze. "I'm scared. I have the worse luck in relationships. They usually end in a bomb and with me feeling even more like shit. I don't wanna fall for someone again only to have it blow up in my face. It kills me every time, Ran. I'm sick of falling for losers. How do I know this time it will be different? How do I know this time he'll be different?"

"You don't know, Johnny." Randy sighed and shrugged. "You just have to try and give it your all. If it's meant to be it'll work out." He smiled and stood up once more. "I'll tell you one thing, though. If he turns out to be a loser that fucks with you, I will take care of him, OK?"

John smiled and stood up as well, turning his attention to his own ring gear. "Thanks, Ran."

* * *

><p>John walked back into the locker room slowly, his body still protesting any exertion after his recent injuries. He walked directly to his chosen locker and began pulling out clothes to change into. His phone's blinking display caught his eye and he reached for it down in the gym bag. A smile came across his face as he read the message from Randy.<p>

"_Sorry I didn't wait around, John-John but I had to get my ass in a bed. My head is still spinning from that fat ass' drop. I'll see you tomorrow for breakfast, though in the lobby of the hotel. No earlier than 10, please! Bring along Matt, if you want. I really do wanna get to know him. _

_PS: Did you see? I called him Matt. I can learn." _

John threw the phone back in his bag and slid off his shorts, quickly stepping into long sweatpants instead. He was anxious to get back to the hotel and rest his weary body. Matt would have to remain, however, for a dark match and some extra meetings with the Creative Dept and Vince and his crew. He hated leaving the younger man but knew he should. His body was being pushed much more than his doctors recommended and John knew it. He also didn't want to be seen leaving at the same time as Matt. They still hadn't decided when to let their relationship become a known thing backstage and John was just fine with keeping it quiet as long as he could. Besides, a bed right now would help him get some of the rest the doctors wanted him to get and it would help him be ready for when Matt got there. A little attention from his young lover would help John more than any bed could.

The door to the locker room swung open and John looked up to see more of his fellow co-workers enter, Cody Rhodes leading the pack. He smiled at the men he called friends and stood up, throwing a hoodie over his t-shirt. "Johnny! Heading out already?"

John nodded over at Cody. "Yeah, kiddo. I'm exhausted and worn down."

"You're turning into an old fart already, John? I thought for sure you would have at least 2 more good years left in you," shouted over Ted from his locker.

John rolled his eyes and flipped him off as Cody walked over and patted his shoulder. "Ignore him, John. God knows we all do. Go back to the hotel and get some rest. We can't have our super duper superstar getting sick."

"I'm not sick, Codes, just sore. All the travel and matches and extra shit have caught up with me, you know," responded John, a smile on his face.

"And I'm sure dealing with Ryder all the time now, too has to be even more exhausting," added Paul from where he sat, drinking a large bottle of water. "How you can deal with his annoying ass all the time…I just couldn't."

John narrowed his eyes and glared over at the large man. "Show, instead of worrying about who I'm hanging out with, why don't you go practice how to take a drop so you don't give anyone else a concussion?"

Paul rolled his eyes and took another gulp of water. "Relax, Cena. Don't get your panties in bunch because you're pissed I hurt your boy. He'll be fine."

"Johnny," Cody quickly grabbed at John's arm, drawing his attention away from Paul and the argument that was beginning to brew. "Randy will be fine so let's focus on you. I know you really like helping Zack but if you tell him you're hurting I'm sure he'll understand and let you off the big brother hook for awhile."

John shook his head and frowned. "I'm not being bothered by Zack, Codes. I like helping him and spending time with him teaching him what I could and…"

"And hanging out in the same hotel room with him at all hours of the night…" mumbled Paul from his seat.

John's gaze spun around, connecting once more with the now smirking man. "Excuse me?"

"I've seen you guys sneaking out late at night from each others hotel rooms. You aren't teaching him a damn thing about this business at that time. You and Ryder got a little more than a big brother/little brother relationship going, don't you, Cena?" asked Paul, the smirk staying put.

John felt his face redden and lowered his eyes. His goal in life was to never feel hatred toward anyone but at that moment he could honestly say he hated Paul White. He hated when anyone got into his personal life. It was the thing he cherished most and only select people were invited in. It was a given that it would be noticed, though. The WWE family had no choice but to think of each other as exactly that; a family. They traveled together and roomed together in very tight quarters most of the time and spent the bulk of their lives with each other instead of the families they were born into. It was hard to hide things and just like a family, gossip was always running rampant. The WWE gossip mill couldn't have run any better if preteen girls ran it and John hated to think he had now become the main focus of one.

"I don't know what you're talking about," John had to swallow back a groan at how weak and pathetic his denial sounded as Paul rolled his eyes. "Of course you don't," he mumbled sarcastically.

John stood up and shrugged, trying to look indifferent. "Well, I don't. Think what you will, I can't control that."

"It's no one's business what you do on your own free time, John." said Cody loudly, shooting Paul a disapproving glance. "You don't have to defend yourself to anyone."

John laughed loudly and shook his head. "I'm not trying to defend myself. I'm just telling the truth, Cody. I have no idea what Show is talking about because there's nothing going on between me and Ryder but a teacher/student relationship. I couldn't deal with anymore, anyway."

"Then why the need to meet up at 2 o'clock in the morning?" asked Paul, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Look, I work all hours of the night and you all know that. I talk to people when I'm available and if that's 2 in the morning then its 2 in the morning!" John looked around the room and raised an eyebrow. "Would you be giving me the 3rd degree if it had been Randy coming out of my room at that time?"

"No, because everyone knows despite how sickeningly close you and Orton and are, you're just friends. He's the only one that we're aware of that you would even allow to be in your room at a time like that. But now, there's Ryder…"

"He's an annoying kid, all right, Show!" interrupted John, stopping Paul from launching into more. "He's a pain in the ass kid who follows me around all day like a little dog and I just put up with him out of pity."

"So, there's nothing going on between you and him?" asked Ted from where he sat, his attempt to get dressed forgotten as he focused on the conversation between Paul and John.

"Teddy, stop it!" scolded Cody gently from where he stood. He turned towards John, concern in his normally happy eyes. "Johnny, you don't have to explain to anyone what your relationship with Zack is…"

"But that's the thing! There is no relationship between me and Ryder!" John laughed and shook his head. "Of all the guys I could pick do you honestly think I would pick Ryder? Jesus, he's not worthy to carry my bags, guys. I mean, it may sound harsh but you know I'm right. Of all the guys I could pick from, do you really think I would pick someone like him?"

"Wow, conceited much, Johnny?" said Ted with a small laugh, sliding his gym bag over his shoulder.

John shrugged and plastered an indifferent expression on his face. "I'm not trying to be conceited, guys. I'm just being honest." He turned over and bent, grabbing his bag from the bottom of his locker. "There's no way someone like me could ever see someone like Zack as someone to consider for a relationship; hell, I barely see him as someone to take seriously."

The door banged shut behind him and John stood, spinning around. His eyes widened as they came into contact with Matt's form, framing the now closed door silently. The younger man locked eyes with him and smiled slowly. "Sorry for interrupting. I tried waiting outside until you all finished your conversation but couldn't wait any longer. I have to get a t-shirt out of my locker."

John cringed inwardly at the cold tone coming out of Matt's voice and felt his heart begin to race at the fear of how much he had heard. Silence was the only sound in the locker room besides Matt's footsteps as he approached his locker but it took only seconds after for everyone else to react.

"I should go hit the shower so I can get the hell out of here…" mumbled Paul as he grabbed a towel and headed for the showers.

"Yeah, I'm done so I am actually out of here," added Ted, heading for the door. He turned to look at Cody and raised an eyebrow. "Codes? You staying or going?"

"I'm going. Wait for me," Cody looked over at Matt then at John, a sad expression on his face. He grabbed his own bag and started towards Ted but stopped to look back at John. "Johnny, are you OK?"

John snapped out of his shock and quickly nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, guys. Go on home. I'm fine."

Cody nodded slowly and followed Ted out of the locker room, the door banging shut behind them. John turned towards Matt and tentatively took a step forward. Matt was turned away from him, bent at the waist as he searched through his locker. John sighed and decided to bite the bullet and speak to the younger man. "Matt..."

"Don't bother." Matt turned over, t-shirt in hand and shook his head. His normally happy eyes and personality had been replaced by a cold glare and stiff pose. "There's no need to say any more, John. You said enough to the boys."

"I didn't mean it, Matt. I was just…"

"Why are you whispering, John?" interrupted Matt, an exasperated sigh escaping his lips. "Scared Paul is gonna hear from the showers?"

John's lips shut and he thought of how to respond. He was torn between throwing it all to hell and letting everyone find out the truth and continuing the lie. The sound from the showers reached his ears and he sighed. "I didn't realize I was whispering,"

Matt rolled his eyes and started to walk away. "Whatever. I don't care."

John quickly moved forward and grabbed his arm. "No, Matt, please don't go! I'm sorry; I didn't mean anything I said to the boys…"

"Then why did you say it?" Matt stopped and turned back around, pulling his arm away from John's grasp.

"I don't want anyone to know about us yet!" John sighed and shrugged. "I didn't know you were listening…"

"So because you didn't know I was listening you thought it was OK to talk about me like that? To make me seem like the most pathetic person ever?" Matt shook his head and looked away from John. "I thought we were something, John. I really thought we were something special. Guess I am pathetic, huh?"

He laughed, the sound sarcastic to John's ear and turned away once more. John quickly reached for him once more and held tightly onto Matt's arm. "No! Matt, please. I'm the pathetic one, not you! We are developing something special. I feel it, too."

Matt remained facing forward, his body stiff. "I have to go, John."

John reluctantly released his arm and took a step back. "Please come back to my hotel room when you're done, Matt. We need to talk about this."

"You talked enough earlier. I heard all I needed to hear and I don't want to talk about anything else. Go live your life and I'll live my own on my own. I don't need people like you in my life." Matt looked at him briefly before grabbing the door and pulling it open. "Goodbye, John."

John watched him walk out of the locker room and felt his heart plummet.

* * *

><p>The next morning came too quickly for Randy but he was thankful he had been able to get a few hours of sleep after the doctor OK'd it. 10 am rolled around sooner than expected and so did the phone call from John letting him now he would be down at the hotel restaurant in half an hour for their breakfast date. He had reluctantly awoken and gotten dressed, not in the mood to hear John's lecture if he didn't show to meet him and Matt for the promised breakfast.<p>

Randy tapped his foot anxiously on the hallway of the hotel as he waited for the elevator. His finger slid over his phone as he shot off a message to his bus driver and told him the time they had to hit the road so he could make it to the arena hosting Smackdown that night.

The doors to the elevator opened and Randy took a step in, his eyes lifting from the phone's screen to the opened structure. The person inside the elevator raised an eyebrow in surprise as Randy entered, making the older man smile. "Hey, guess you're on your way down to breakfast, too."

Matt's eyes widened when Randy spoke to him for the first time ever, a confused expression taking its place on his face. He lifted the large travel bag in his hand and shook his head. "Breakfast? I'm heading home."

Randy frowned and stared at the younger man. "I thought you were having breakfast with me and John…"

A stern expression replaced the confused look on Matt's face. "Why would I have breakfast with you and John?"

"Uh, I told John to invite you because I want us to get to know each other." Randy's frown deepened and he took a step closer to Matt. "You do know that I know what's going on between you and John, right? John told me how you guys…"

"John and I are nothing and he made that very clear last night in the men's locker room when he called me annoying, a pain in the ass, unworthy to even carry his bags and someone he barely takes seriously much less would consider for a relationship," interrupted Matt harshly. "Apparently all it takes for Cena to give up is a little questioning from the Big Show."

"Wait a minute. You're telling me John told Show all those things you said? He didn't tell you them?" asked Randy, his eyes darting over to the panel lighting the floors as the elevator went down.

"Yeah. I heard him talking to Show, Cody and Ted. Show saw me leaving John's room late one night and was giving him a hard time about it. I guess John couldn't take it and threw me under the bus." Matt laughed and took a step closer to the doors as the elevator approached the lobby floor.

Randy's mind spun and not only from the lingering effects of the concussion. His confusion over what Matt was telling him was making him dizzy. He couldn't comprehend what the younger man was telling him John had done, especially after his best friend had proclaimed his love for Matt the day before.

Before the elevator could reach the ground floor, Randy reached his hand out and pressed the emergency stop button, grinding the elevator to a halt. Matt stared at him in disbelief as the elevator jolted to a stop. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Trying to understand what the hell you're telling me because the John I know would never say the things you're saying he said about someone he loves," answered Randy. "He told me he was falling in love with you so how did it go from that to what you're saying now?"

Something flickered across Matt's face at Randy's statement and he lowered his eyes. "He said he was falling in love with me? Then why did he say all those hurtful things about me? I thought he was so perfect…I couldn't believe he wanted to be with me…I don't understand."

Matt shrugged and raised his eyes back up to meet Randy's, an embarrassed flush on his face now. "It was fine if he didn't want our relationship to come out yet but he didn't have to do it that way."

Randy sighed and shook his head. "I can't believe I'm doing this. I don't get involved in John's life and I damn sure don't interfere in his love life because in my opinion no one is ever good enough," He leaned against the wall of the elevator and studied the man in front of him. "I don't know you. I haven't made an effort to get to know you because I never thought I would have to. Sounds like an asshole thing to say, probably but…" Randy stopped and shrugged. "The minute John told me your relationship had changed from friendship to something more, though, I wanted to get to know you and see exactly what your plan was for him. John is a good man; too damn good of a man sometimes and he sees only the good in people. He's been used by too many who called themselves his friends and told him they loved him and it's destroyed him each time. I wasn't going to let anyone else do that to him. He's my best friend and I would first kill someone before I let them hurt him again. That's why I told him to invite you to breakfast this morning. I wanted to see what your angle was."

"I don't have an angle, Randy. I fell in love with John somewhere along the line of him just being my friend. Imagine my surprise when he told me he was starting to care about me, too. Me; some kid who was just starting to make a name for himself! I would've never thought John would ever see me as anything more than someone he was just doing a favor for." Matt's voice rose in anger. "It was just crap, though. He doesn't give two shits about me."

"You wanna know something else about John?" continued Randy, ignoring Matt's anger. "People seem to think he's some kind of superhero; like he's more than human. I've got news for them and apparently for you, who seems to think the same. John is human. He is just a man and he makes mistakes like we all do. He gets scared and he does the wrong thing sometimes."

Randy stood up from the wall and sighed. "If John said those things, Matt, he didn't mean them. He probably felt cornered by the boys and tried to defend himself. John hates being part of any gossip in the locker room and I was the only one he told about your relationship and it's only because he trusts me more than anyone else there. He knows I would never betray that trust. He was probably trying to get them off the trail or something…I'm sure he never expected you would hear it."

"Well I did and I'm not as sure of his innocence as you are," responded Matt.

"Then maybe you don't deserve to be with him." Randy turned away and released the emergency button, feeling the elevator come to a start once more. "Did you even let him explain?"

"I couldn't hear anymore from him, Randy," mumbled Matt.

"How can you say you love John but you won't let him explain? If you know John, you know the real him. You don't fall for the Super Cena front because you know the real man. He made a mistake, Matt and if you really love him, you'll let him explain because I know he really loves you." Randy pulled his keycard out of his back pocket and extended it to Matt. "If you love him, go up to my room, wait for him and listen to him when he explains. I'll send him up."

The elevator doors finally opened on the hotel lobby but neither man moved. Randy looked down at his hand and raised an eyebrow. "Well? What's it gonna be?"

Matt's eyes lowered to look at the key and slowly reached for it. "Fine."

Randy nodded and walked out of the elevator without a look back. He headed straight for the hotel restaurant and spotted John in one of the back tables. His step quickened and John looked up as he approached, a small smile on his face but the sadness evident in his eyes.

"Hey, what took you so long?" John shook his head before Randy could answer. "It doesn't matter. Sit and eat with me. It's just us two because Matt won't be here…"

"Will he not be here because he heard you saying some really shitty things about him last night?" interrupted Randy, a smirk on his face. John's eyes widened and his lips parted. "How…"

"I ran into him in the elevator," answered Randy. He sighed as he slid into the chair across from John. "What happened, Johnny? What did you do?"

John's entire face dropped and he lowered his head into his hands. "I'm a moron, that's what happened. Show found out and started harassing me and I lied because I didn't want anyone to know yet so I said some things about Matt…Ran, he heard it all and pretty much told me we were done. God, I'm so stupid! I was just bullshitting, though, I swear! I didn't mean anything I said. I just wanted Show to stop with the questions and the insinuations…"

"OK, I believe you, Johnny." Randy reached forward and squeezed John's hands. "I'm not the one you have to convince, though. Convince Matt before you lose him forever."

"I already lost him, Ran. He wants nothing to do with me. I fucked things up already," mumbled John, raising his head slightly.

"No, you didn't. You have a chance to make things right. Go up to my room. He's waiting for you," Randy squeezed John's hand once more before pulling back. John stared at him with a confused frown. "What? Why did you do that?"

"Because you love him and he loves you. I could see it by how miserable he was," Randy rolled his eyes and smiled. "Besides, you're my bro and I love you so I think that means I have to at least try to help you when you fuck up. You've done it for me how many times, right?"

John smiled and stood up, walking around to Randy's chair and hugging him tightly. "Thank you, Ran. You're the best."

Randy nodded. "I know. Go,"

John pulled back and turned away, quickly walking out of the crowded restaurant. His heart thudded with each step but he continued on, into the elevator and up to the floor Randy's room was located on. He took a deep breath when he found himself standing before it and before knocked softly on the closed hotel room door. John held his breath as he waited for it to open and seconds later it did. His eyes connected with Matt's and a flood of guilt overwhelmed him when he saw how sad and hurt the younger man still looked. Gone was the smile and personality Matt was known for; two of the qualities that made him fall in love with Matt in the first place.

"Can I come in?"

Matt slowly nodded and stepped back, widening the door for him to enter. He closed it quietly and turned around to meet John's nervous gaze. "You have a wonderful friend in Randy. He seems to think only the best of you. Me; I'm not so sure."

John sighed, realizing this wouldn't be easy. "Can we sit and talk about this? Please, Matt."

Matt stared at him for a few minutes, debating in his head whether to stay or walk out. The look on John's face was of pure nervousness and he hated seeing it. There was nothing more Matt loved than seeing John smile happily, his dimples deep in his handsome face. Despite how angry he was at him, Matt couldn't help but still love the older man. He moved over to the small sofa in the room and lowered his body down. "Fine, talk."

John tentatively walked over and sat beside Matt, carefully leaving some distance between them. "Matt, I'm so sorry for what you heard yesterday. I can only imagine how hurt you must have felt at hearing those words…"

"So you're sorry I heard them but are you sorry you said them?" asked Matt, a frown on his face. John quickly reached a hand forward and took Matt's, squeezing it tightly. "Of course I am! I would give anything to take it back!"

Matt looked down, staring at his hand enveloped by John's. "Why did you say it in the first place then?"

John shrugged. "I was trying to hide it, our relationship. I thought we had been so careful then Show had to ruin everything. I didn't want to tell him he was right. I didn't want his nosy ass to be the reason we had to come out as a couple. It should be our choice when we do and I didn't want him to take that away from us. He made me so angry and I just wanted to shut him up." He let go of Matt's hand and reached for his face instead, lifting it so their eyes could meet. "I never meant to hurt you. I would never hurt you, baby,"

Matt recoiled from his touch and pulled away. "Don't call me that,"

"Matt, please," John sighed and withdrew his hand. "I didn't mean a word I said. I was just saying anything that would get the boys to back off. You know I don't think any of those things about you. I'm so sorry."

"Randy told me you were falling in love with me. How can you say those things about someone you love, John? I love you and I could never, under any circumstances say negative things about you. My lips just wouldn't be able to form the words," Matt shook his head and sighed. "I hate the things the boys think about me in the back. They think I'm a joke but you've never made me feel like that. When our relationship started changing I was so happy but at the same time so scared. I was sure you were gonna wake up one day and ask yourself what the hell you were doing with me, of all people. I mean, you could have your choice, John. You never left, though. You seemed happy with me and it made me relax. Then, yesterday…"

"You love me?" asked John doubtfully. Matt raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "Is that all you got from everything I said? Jesus, John…"

"No! I heard everything you said but…you love me? You've never said it before."

Matt shrugged in response to John's confused question. "Well, you love me and I had to hear it from Randy for the first time so…"

John smiled and nodded. "Sorry about that. I trust him and I told him how I feel, which explains why he asked you to come up here and hear me out." His smile dropped slightly and he turned away. "I can't change what happened, Matt. All I could do is apologize and keep apologizing until you forgive me because I'm not letting you get away, Matt; I don't want to let you go."

Matt sighed and remained silent, his mind fighting his heart, which quickly reacted to John's words. The older man reached for his hand once more and held it tightly, stroking the skin on top. "Baby, please tell me I still have a chance. I will tell everyone how much I love you and proudly call you mine if you forgive me and I swear I will never hurt you again. Please, Matt, tell me what I can do to prove to you how much I want to be with you; now more than ever that I know we're in love."

"I don't know, John." Matt took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "This is a weird situation for me to be in. I fell for you so fast and it scared me because I never thought you would feel the same so I swore I was just setting myself up to get hurt. Then when I heard you talking, I figured I had been proved right. But now…I just don't know what to believe John. Why do you love me? Why aren't you annoyed by me or embarrassed by me? I'm nothing compared to you."

"Are you kidding me? I think after last night anyone would say you're worth a hell of a lot more compared to me." John smiled and moved his body closer to Matt's on the small sofa they shared. "You are nothing to be annoyed by or embarrassed by. You're such a wonderful person, Matt. You've busted your ass to get where you are and you've become a success all on your own. You're smart and so dedicated to what you love. You make me laugh but I can sit with you and have a serious conversation, too. You let me vent and rant about things and you comfort me when I feel overwhelmed. You can poke fun at yourself and you taught me to do the same." He shrugged. "Do I really have to keep going? You're one of the best friends I've ever had and sometimes that turns into more. It did for us. We fell in love and I want us to keep going and fall deeper and I want everyone to know it. Please, Matt,"

Matt inhaled sharply, his nose filling with the scent of John's cologne; a scent he loved. His eyes closed as he inhaled deeply and he heard John shift even closer to him. "I love you, John and I want nothing more than to believe everything you just said is true. I'm scared, though. How do I know the next time someone teases you about dating Zack Ryder, you're not gonna respond the same way?"

"Because I'm swearing to you that I won't. I'm asking you to have faith in that; have faith in me and believe it." John closed the remaining distance between him and Matt on the couch and reached up to cup the younger man's face in his hands. "I will never hurt you again. I love you and I want to try to make this work."

Matt's eyes slowly opened and he parted his lips. "John…"

"What, baby?"

"Please kiss me," whispered Matt, moving his arms to wrap around John's waist and pull him closer.

With a low, throaty growl, John pulled their bodies tightly together and kissed Matt deeply. Heat flowed over Matt's body in a wave. The air in the room disappeared, sucked away by the force and passion of John's kiss. Fireworks went off in Matt's head, his heart booming as John's tongue plunged into his mouth again and again. His muscles flexed, crushing John against him, and when they parted it was only because they had to breathe.

For several moments, they sat, staring at each other in silence. John couldn't speak as he contemplated what he'd almost lost. He ran a fingertip over Matt's right cheekbone as he gazed into his eyes.

"Thank you for giving me a second chance," John whispered. "Not many people would and I'm not sure I even deserve it but I swear to you I will never hurt you again, Matt."

"I know," Matt smiled and grasped John's waist, his fingers going under the t-shirt he wore. "Let's just move on and go forward." He leaned forward and kissed John once more, moving his lips down to his neck. John pulled him in close and Matt pulled himself into his lap, his lips still attached to John's neck.

"John, you taste so good..." Matt said in between kisses.

"Matt..." John tilted his head to allow Matt better access.

Matt straddled John's lap and gently cupped his face in his hands and looked into his eyes. "Is this real? Are you really mine?"

"Yes, I am and you can tell anyone you want because I plan on telling everyone that you're mine," John smiled. "Being around you makes me feel better than I've felt in a long, long time," he closed his eyes and rested his head against the back of the sofa.

"Think Randy would mind if we use his bed? I mean, he's done with it…" Matt asked.

John kissed the back of Matt's hand and shook his head. They both pulled themselves up and headed for the large bed. Neither let go of the other's hand, and the very thought of letting John go right now caused Matt's heart to physically ache.

They stopped at the foot of the bed, standing so close together that Matt could feel John's breath on his face. John frowned nervously and looked at the younger man. "Are you sure about this? We've never…"

Matt nodded and reached out, slowly lifting John's shirt. "I'm positive. I'm ready," He said as he continued to undress his lover, "You made a lot of promises earlier and now it's my turn to make a few promises of my own. I will never do anything to hurt you, John. I promise that I will never betray your trust."

"I know," John whispered. "It's nice to be able to trust someone again besides Randy."

Matt lifted John's shirt from his shoulders before moving his hands down to his belt. "I don't want anyone else and I'm not looking to use you as a meal ticket. I'm not planning on going anywhere. I'm right where I belong when I'm with you, John."

John pulled Matt in for a fierce kiss. By this point he was wearing only his boxers, with his jeans in a pile at his feet. He stepped out of them before pushing Matt onto the bed, practically ripping his shirt in an attempt to get it off quickly. He made fast work of removing the remainder of Matt's clothes, with Matt arching his back so that John could pull his jeans and boxers down, and then throwing them onto the floor. Once John had removed his own boxers, he pulled himself on top of Matt and ground their erections together.

"Oh God..." Matt moaned. "John, I want you so bad."

"You've got me," John said, kissing along Matt's collarbone and then down his body. He stopped when he reached Matt's erection. He kissed Matt's hip before taking the cock into his mouth, but Matt wanted more.

"I need you, John," Matt panted. "I need to feel you inside me."

John moaned around Matt's dick then let it fall from his mouth. "Again, are you sure?"

"Yes," Matt answered. "I'm positive."

John moved up to crush his lips against Matt's, the kiss leaving them both breathless. John pulled back and Matt spread his legs and stared up into his partner's eyes.

"Please, John."

John hungrily looked over Matt's body. "You're perfect," he said in a whisper. He moved to kneel between Matt's legs, tracing his hands down the skin of his thighs. "So beautiful..."

John coated a couple of fingers with Matt's pre-cone before ducking his head to place a kiss on his chest. He reached for Matt's entrance, resting his fingers there for a moment. Matt could see the question in John's eyes.

"Don't you dare ask me if I'm sure again. I want this. I want you."

John laughed softly and nodded. "OK, bossy," He slowly pushed a finger inside and Matt moaned, lost in the sensations of John moving inside him. The pain quickly subsided and before long John was added a second digit, and then a third. Matt started to push himself back onto John's fingers, moaning and begging for more. John loved the pleasure he was bringing the younger man and his own dick was hard and ready to explode.

When John's fingers hit his prostate, Matt thought he was going to die. "Oh my God, John…enough! Please!"

Matt was desperate to feel John inside him. He wanted to make that connection with him, to become a part of each other in every sense. John removed his fingers from Matt's hole and pulled away, quickly digging in his discarded pants pocket for his wallet. He pulled a condom out and Matt looked up just in time to see the condom being rolled down John's hard-on. He watched John lube up with more of his leaking pre-cum and then rested his head back onto the mattress, pulling his legs back as far as they would go.

John leaned across Matt's body, his knees between Matt's legs and his dick positioned at his entrance. They never broke eye contact as John pushed forward slowly.

"Matt, you feel so good... so tight..." John moaned as the head of his cock popped in. He held completely still until Matt couldn't take it anymore. "More, John."

John rested his hands on the mattress by Matt's head and began to push further into his body until his entire length was inside the younger man. When Matt finally nodded to signal that he was okay, John pulled out slowly before thrusting back in. John kissed along Matt's neck and down to a nipple before pulling back once again.

"Harder, John..." moaned Matt softly.

They kissed deeply and John pulling out almost completely before slamming back into Matt's tight heat. He repeated the action over and over, setting a fast pace and hitting Matt's prostate with each thrust. Matt couldn't hold back the loud moans and groans John was bringing out of him. He arched his back and pushed himself further onto John's dick.

"Baby…so good..." John panted, his body glistening with sweat.

Matt could no longer speak. He was so close to losing it. He wanted to hold back and make this moment last longer, but there was no stopping it now. He reached down for his cock, wrapping his fingers around it and jacking himself off. He was teetering on the edge of his orgasm.

"Cum for me, baby. We can go longer the next time." John moaned into Matt's ear.

John's words sent Matt over the edge and he shouted out John's name as he came between their bodies. The muscles of his ass clenched around John's dick as he continued to pound into him.

"Matt, you're so beautiful when you cum," John panted. He was close and within moments John's body tensed as he shot his seed into the condom and then collapsed on top of Matt. Exhausted but happy, Matt wrapped his arms around John's back and held him tight to his chest. It took a while for either one of them to catch their breath.

"Holy shit, Cena."

John laughed. "Yeah, that was...wow." He rolled off of Matt, sliding out of him as he did. Matt groaned and nodded, turning over towards him.

"We've made a mess," John commented, looking down at their damp bodies that were covered in sweat and cum. "And in Randy's bed. God, he's gonna kill me."

Matt laughed. "It's not his real bed. This isn't his home. It's just a hotel room and I'm sure other people have had sex on this bed."

John smiled, bending and grabbing a discarded t-shirt and wiping his and Matt's body clean before dropping it back on the ground and wrapping his arms around the younger man. "I didn't hurt you, did I?" He asked, looking worried.

"I'm a little sore but it's a good type of sore," Matt said with a smile.

"Good." John He sighed contentedly when Matt pulled himself closer, resting his head on John's chest. He fell asleep like that, listening to John's steady heartbeat and John soon found himself drifting off as well. A loud chime from his jeans pocket drew his attention and John reluctantly moved off the bed. He bent and grabbed his phone out of the discarded jeans, quickly smiling as he read over the text from Randy.

"_It's half an hour to check out so I suggest you get a move on. Leave my bag outside the front door because I'm guessing since you haven't come back down it means you worked things out with Matt and I shouldn't even go into that room. As gross as it sounds, fingers crossed something good happened in there. Will I be booking 3 seats to St. Louis tonight instead of 2?"_

John's smile widened as he looked at the younger man resting contently in bed. He quickly typed back one word to Randy before heading back to get a couple more minutes of rest with his love before heading back into the real world, something he no longer feared with Matt by his side.

"_Absolutely."_

**A/N: Hope you all liked, especially Fishyqueen! Gonna go work on LOVE now!**


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